AS A CHRITIAN WHEN IS IT OKAY TO DIVORCE?
This question is very technical and sensitive because originally God did not make provisions for divorce in any marriage relationship. God instituted marriage for the man and his wife to be united as one flesh till the end. “For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother, and be joined to his wife; and they shall become one flesh” Genesis 2: 24. On this same topic, Moses had permitted folks in the Old Testament to give certificate of divorcement if they wanted to put away their wives. However, the Lord Jesus Christ explained why Moses allowed that. “…Moses permitted divorce only as a concession to your hard hearts, but it was not what God had originally intended” Matthew 19: 8. You can see that God did not intend for divorce in marriages. He even said that He hates divorce. “I hate divorce,” says the LORD God of Israel” Malachi 2: 16.
If God hates divorce so much, why do people, including Christians divorce or want to put away their wives or husbands? The reason is very simple. It is the same reason the Lord Jesus Christ I identified with the folks in the Old Testament – stubbornness. The Word of God said, “What therefore God has joined together let not man separate” Mark 10: 9. If you divorce your wife or husband for any reason except for the condition the Lord Jesus gave, you will be committing a sin. “I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, and marries another woman commits adultery” Matthew 19: 9.
There are other circumstances that may warrant a divorce technically but they are not general rules that must be applied by everybody. If the foundation of your marriage is sure from the beginning or you did not allow the devil any room at some point, no reason suffices for any divorce. In a marriage where one of the partners has become violent and the life of the other partner is now being threatened, one can advise a separation but this is when all avenues for amendment have been exhausted.
When a partner insist the other spouse MUST leave for whatever reason, if all efforts to reconcile them fails, the other part can leave and the separation would not be his or her fault. Even in clans where polygamy is prevalent, divorce is NOT also permitted except the man asked one of the wives to leave then the woman is free. The Apostle Paul commands the churches thus, “Yet if the unbelieving one leaves, let him leave; the brother or the sister is not under bondage in such cases, but God has called us to peace. For how do you know O wife whether you will save your husband? Or how do you know, O husband, whether you will save your wife? Only, as the Lord has assigned to each one, as God has called each, in this manner let him walk. And so I direct in all the churches”1 Corinthians 7:15 -17.
God instituted marriage but man created divorce. Prayerfully ensure the foundation of your marriage is secure in Christ through the Word of God. All you need to make your marriage work is the Word of God – that is the best marriage counseling material you can ever find. So go for the Word and your marriage will be unshakeable