AS A CHRISTIAN HOW DO I KNOW HE’S THE ONE
With so many different words used to describe the status of your relationship. Dating! Courting! Seeing someone! You always forget that the primary purpose of that season is to evaluate whether or not he is the one God has chosen for you.
Even though you may have an idea of what you consider as ‘husband material,’ you might not know what signs to look for. And the last thing you want to do is let your feeling get in the way of your true happiness.
While it’s easy to describe that he is not the one based on his actions, some signs will convince you that he is a material husband, and he is the one God has chosen for you.
SECOND TO GOD, YOU SHOULD MEAN EVERYTHING TO HIM; NOTHING ELSE IN THIS WORLD BESIDES JESUS AND FAMILY SHOULD MATTER.
Not his work, not his friends, not his career, not his own achievements, and hobbies, nothing else will come close to the happiness that he would have if you were that one girl (though all these things are very important, he won’t be as concerned with them if he is really, truly, fully in love).
He’d sacrifice these things to spend time with you, get to know you, and learn how to love you. Love shouldn’t be forced or have to work hard to fall in love with another person.
Do not just do all the right things, say all the right words, and stay together in the right way. There must be a genuine and enduring foundation for your love.
Ask yourself the following question: Does he know me? Do I know him?
ONE DAY, SOMEONE WILL COME ALONG AND YOU’LL OUTRIGHT, UNASHAMEDLY LOVE THAT PERSON.
He will make you forget about your existing life, and he’ll sweep you off your feet. You will both want to make a life together, and you will be blind to all that stands in the way of your love for each other. Everything else around you is going to dim in comparison to seeing his face in the house. And you won’t want to leave his side for a moment. And he won’t leave yours.
You will love each other, despite what life throws your way — it would be a tiny set back in the light of your love because you will have each other, and that’d be enough.
You may think it’s unlikely for anyone to feel that way. You might think that everything I’ve just said is a crazy fantasy and wishful thinking. But it isn’t. God will bring all this into your life if you completely sacrifice everything that you have to be His, and you fall in love with Jesus. And when you enter into a relationship with the person of His dreams for you, the two of you will never want to stop thinking about your love for each other and the love of the one who put you together. It’s going to be a three-way relationship between you, your loved one, and Jesus Christ.
Love is going to overcome every pit that the devil sends your way. Love will overcome any difference or conflict between you and other issues.
Your love for each other would be priceless. It will be genuine, it will be better than anything you’ve ever known, and it will be forever because Jesus is at the core of it all.
Most importantly, this young man and woman who are together will be together under the Lord. They will faithfully lead the hearts of each other closer to the Heart of Jesus. They will not be greedy and spend time together purely for “fun.” They should encourage each other to grow in the ways of the Lord.
God says that He blesses those who love Him with good things-for the glorification of His name and for “His name’s sake.” He brings you into a good and strong, godly relationship for a reason just as He brings other things into your life for a reason. And that goal is always to bring glory to Him.
Will you bring glory to Jesus through your relationship by honoring Him and the people He has put in your lives? Always at the forefront of any godly relationship, Jesus will come first and foremost in both your lives. While you are together, you need to have a personal and private relationship with Jesus. Speak to your Savior while you’re together and think about Him together, yes. But still spend time alone in searching and putting God above all things in your life — including your loved one.
When you first became a Christian and became faithfully, un-regrettably bound to eternity with your Lord, you felt a fire in your heart. When you think about what Jesus did for you on the cross, you feel endless gratitude and affection for your sweet, sweet Jesus.
ROMANTIC LOVE FOR THE ONE YOUR SOUL FINDS WILL ONLY BE AN INDICATION OF HOW MUCH JESUS LOVES YOU.
We will never completely understand how much God loves us, but we will have a taste of it as we search for Jesus with all our hearts, soul, and mind. And when we do this, he’ll give us someone to share that love with.
To help you decide if he’s right for you, I will share ten godly signs on how to know he’s the one God has for you.
1. HE MUST BE A PERSON OF HIS WORDS
I said it earlier, and I am going to say it again. If someone tells you who they are, trust them.
The only thing I advise you to consider early in the dating process is if he keeps his word? A man who’s in it for a long time needs to be trustworthy and make sure he is reliable.
He will not say one thing and do another. But rather show you, by his acts, that he’s serious about you.
Many people will think about all the things they want to do, but just a few are really going to follow up and put in the work. And they will only do it for the one woman they value.
When God sends a man to you, the man must have integrity and stand by his word.
2. HE KNOWS WHAT HE WANTS
We live in a moment when millions of people are at the tip of our thumbs and index fingers. And that affected a man’s willingness to devote himself to a woman.
A lot of them are afraid that they could find someone ‘better’ after they’re already committed to you, but if you ask them what ‘better’ is, they don’t seem to put it in words.
If God has put him in your life, that won’t be the case for him. He will have classified you as the right one for himself, based on your personality, actions, and most definitely, your looks (yes, attraction plays a role).
A man who knows what he wants will show you his relationship goals early on, without fear that you may get too optimistic. He will have a vision for the relationship he’s looking for and who he wants in it.
3. HE PURSUES YOU
We all know the saying in movies, “He’s not that into you.”
One of the many signs that you’re dating someone who really isn’t attractive to you is that he will not make an effort to be with you. You initiate every meeting, and sometimes a date is arranged by you, too.
However, when God sends you the right man, he will actively follow you. He’ll call, he’ll text, and he’ll enjoy planning a date or two to make you happy.
Because one of God’s most obvious signs about relationships is that God would bring an end to the relationships if the guy isn’t the one and keep it flourishing if he’s the one.
4. HE’S YOUR ANSWERED PRAYER
I really do not want to inspire you to treat God like a genie who answers a man’s unrealistic expectations. I want you to be motivated by the fact that God loves you and loves the man he has for you.
If your sincere prayer for a godly man with godly characteristics, then you will know that God has sent your mate because he possesses them.
Remember that God has created each one of us beautifully and wonderfully. He knows exactly who’s right for you, and He’ll give you when the time is right. Therefore, if he is godly, you won’t have to lower or compromise on your expectations.
5. THE RELATIONSHIP GLORIFIES GOD
How do you know if God wishes you to be with someone else? Simple, if being with him, does not compromise your relationship with God but rather strengthens it.
The one God has for you will have the same desire for God, and he encourages you to follow Christ. He has the same beliefs and values, like a godly lifestyle that puts God first because God will not send you someone who corrupts your integrity or leads you astray.
You will recognize that your relationship glorifies God when your conversation and actions respect God with your body, mind, and soul.
6. HE MAKES YOU LOVE YOURSELF
There’s a very real assumption that if you feel comfortable with your partner without make-up, he’s the one. And that’s real! But I believe you’ve got to remove more than just make-up—namely the walls around your heart.
And one way to know if he’s the one God has for you is to feel absolutely comfortable being weak!
Sometimes revealing our deepest secrets and biggest flaws can be a challenge because we’re afraid they may not like it and leave or simply because we’re ashamed of them.
However, the true one will make you feel good about yourself and love you just as you are. And if you can trust him and enjoy seeing yourself through his eyes, he may just be the one that God has for you.
7. YOU BECOME PART OF EACH OTHER’S LIFE
Although your days don’t revolve around each other, they certainly include each other. Before he schedules a week with his friends, he ensures that you spend time with each other.
And whenever he has exciting news to share or something to think about, you are the first person that comes to his mind.
I know this might sound cheesy, but the best relationships are when a couple sees each other as their best friends.
It’s very easy to believe that physical attraction is all you need in a relationship, and thus underestimates a true bond. But if you rely solely on sexual intimacy and underestimate compatibility, you will easily end up in a situation and find yourself stuck in a strange relationship.
But suppose you love spending time together and love chatting for hours. In that case, you can get a lot further from a causal relationship to a serious relationship, because he already sees you as part of his life.
The best way to go from Situationship to Relationship is when you don’t just love each other romantically, but as a person, and you can laugh at the same thing.
8. YOU MAKE EACH OTHER BETTER
The truth is that any relationship, whether romantic or not, will add to your life and not remove from it.
And the man with whom you want to spend the rest of your life should be a safe haven for your feelings, dreams, and your journey. The last thing you want is being with someone who does not support or believe in you.
Is he there for you when life is difficult?
If he is the one for you, he will help you overcome obstacles that made you felt like giving up.
9. YOU TRUST HIM
Too often, we put up with someone who isn’t trustful, only to find out that our gut feeling was right all along, and we did not realize that God ended our relationship.
But trust must be earned and granted only after he has shown you that he is trustworthy.
Look out for his acts when he’s around you. Is it transparent and communicative or closed up and hard to read?
Does he have an issue with you being close while he’s on the phone or reading e-mails, or does he ask you to pick up a phone call if he’s busy?
Such habits may seem tiny, but if he’s excessively secretive around you, it’s a clear sign that he’s hiding bigger things from you.
In a growing relationship, the worries and suspicions will disappear the more time you spend together. You will start trusting him, not only in the relationship but also with your life, goals, and the future. The man you’re committed to will be a great leader you enjoy following.
10. HE RESPECTS YOU
Too often, we believe that respecting others applies to the way we relate to them. However, respect in relationships is part of the framework you create and can make or break.
It’s the everyday patterns you have got to watch out for in the beginning.
Does he value your time and give you his full attention while you’re together, or is he worried about work and other things?
If your first instinct is to defend him by offering a bad explanation as to why he ignores his text messages while he’s with you, this is a strong indicator that something is wrong.
Yeah, we’re all busy nowadays, but spending quality time with each other is vital and a choice you have to make.
Another way to know if he respects you is by conversation. Is he cutting you off constantly while you talk about something? Or does he value your opinion and appreciate your point of view?
No two people will see eye to eye on everything, which is good because it means that you’re challenging each other as people.
But if you think you’re constantly being reprimanded, cut off, or laughed about, then that’s an indication that he doesn’t value you, and he doesn’t see you as a grown woman who has a right to her own opinions.
Last but not least, is he loyal to you? This is an important one!
Remember, being in a relationship means that you two are merging two entirely different families, backgrounds, and experiences.
That means you will run into circumstances where one of you is wrongly viewed. And only if the two of you can stick by each other, can your relationship succeed.
Being loyal is a kind of respect that shows you that he has your back even if it means that he has to oppose the people he cherishes.
Hopefully, this will help you discern if the man you love is the “ONE.” Compare the way he treats you to the way Jesus treats you, and ask yourself if he gives you the true love of Agape.